OR ... I should have been a bear ...
I should’ve been a bear. No really … hear me out. I would be an excellent bear. In the summer I like to play outside, stroll through the woods, and eat berries. In the winter I’d really rather hibernate than do anything. Maybe not sleep all winter, but stay holed up in a nice, warm spot with lots of hot food and a collection of good books. Sadly, since work and school are things that must be done, I cannot live as a bear and hibernate.
Today was what I call an “off day” or a “lazy day.” It was Monday, raining (AGAIN), cold (AGAIN), and pretty much was just miserable outside. The kids didn’t have school because of a teachers' inservice, Drew was home for at least part of the day before driving back to Chattanooga for work. And I just didn’t wanna. Didn’t wanna what? Didn’t wanna do anything really. I wanted to hibernate.
I did make myself leave the house long enough to go vote and see the two patents on my schedule today and I did cook supper for me and the kids (thanks Crock Pot Express!) I had a lot of other things I needed to do. Did they get done? Nope. Did I beat myself up about it? Maybe a little, but not really. Something else I have realized about myself over the past months is that when I do have these “off days” it’s better if I indulge in the “do nothingness” and get it out of my system. If I don’t and try to work on stuff despite it, I end up getting very little done. I just wander aimlessly from one project to another maybe getting a little bit done, but not enough to matter, which only frustrates me more and makes me less likely to want to work on those things later. If I do take a day to do nothing, I usually have at least some ambition back the next day, if not all of it.
I could beat myself up about doing nothing all day. Once upon a time, and not too long ago, I would have. Bree did beat herself up about doing not much all day. She painted and played and rested. She didn't get her laundry put up. I told her, "Oh well, it'll be there tomorrow." There is always time to rest. Everything will be there tomorrow.
These "off" days are probably my body’s way of making me rest. I’m one of those people who has a hard time sitting still and doing nothing. I’m always busy. Even when we just sit and watch TV in the evenings I’ll get out crocheting to work on so I’m not just sitting there. If you know my parents, you know this is likely an inherited trait! So, I go go go, work work work all the time and after a while my body says, “OK then! And now it’s time for you to stop and actually rest! Let’s just kick that motivation level on down to 0!”
Writing this is literally the only ambition I have had all day. If I had gotten home closer to supper time I probably would have cheated and gotten take out for supper so I didn’t have to cook even. But lentil soup in the CrockPot Express was fast and easy and didn’t take much effort on my part. And now that this post is written I feel that tiny bit of ambition draining away. My brain is telling me to sleeeeeep. And so I shall. For more OpalTurtle Ramblings head over to The OpalTurtle on Facebook where entertainment and hair inspirations are endless!